The Heartshaping Mother

---This post was a draft from February of 2012... yes, I haven't written in like a year and a half. I'd like to change that soon, blah blah blah, no promises. Figured I'd just go ahead and publish this even though it's oooold. I also attended this again in Irvine and it was just as great... but I gave my notes away so... you get last year's manna. But don't worry, it's not stinky. It's all good stuff!---


I went to the Mom Heart Conference this past weekend and it was so encouraging! This was my second year to attend and I'm so glad I did. This should definitely be a permanent event on my yearly calendar. Except next year I think I'll stay the night at the hotel. =)

Last year I blogged all my notes, and now I'm here to do the same! I hope something here will inspire you, refresh you, challenge you, and give you the joy and grace to carry on strong and passionate in your walk as a mom!

(Forgive me for any inconsistency in thought, as some of these are random, while some go along with certain themes that were spoken about in the sessions. Some are tips, some are reminders, some are words of encouragement. I'm just going straight through my notes from start to finish, not in order of importance).

The theme this year was "The Heartshaping Mother"... how to open, fill and hold your child's heart.

* Find an older woman who makes you want to love God more, and let her mentor you.

* Your children WILL mimic you-- Be, say, do what you want to see in them.

* When you feel like you lack support, make sure your hope isn't misplaced away from God-- HE is your help.

* Motherhood isn't just a sacrifice, it's a GIFT-- it's "the good works He has prepared in advance for you to do." Look at an "inconvenience" and see it as an opportunity. Embrace it!

* Entrust older children with authority to help with younger siblings.

*When they ask "Why?" say "Ill give you two guesses -- They guess right and you praise them.

* If you don't enjoy the moment while it's there, it's gone.

* They are not out to get me. They get hungry, tired, forgetful... but they DO want to please me.

* God is not finished yet! With me OR with them.

* Psalm 121:1 "Where does my help come from? The Lord, the maker of heaven and earth."

* It's never gonna get easy, but it's worth it and your capacity is greater than you think.

* Your children are your ministry. Serve as unto the Lord.

* Motherhood is the most powerful thing you can do.

* You are a supermodel! A rockstar! Kind of a big deal =)

* You have to be in God's Word, know it and share it with your kids- they WILL remember the verses you speak!

* Method for studying the Bible: SOAP- write Scripture down, Observation, Application, Prayer

* Satan lies to us when we are along-- have friends around you to encourage you and tell you the truth!

* Every morning we have to gather "manna" to nourish our souls and it will be exactly what we need for that day.

* Just as dads who are teaching their kids to ride a bike want them to get back on when they fall, and don't expect them to be perfect cyclists from the get-go, God feels the same way about us as mommies.

* Teach your kids how to write their testimony, and urge them to tell their friends.

* Teach them to read their Bible for themselves.

* Disciple them-- so they can do it on their own.

* Encourage them to serve and be exposed to pain in others' lives.

* TARGET: to walk intimately with God. Decide 1) When to have time with Him. 2) Where 3) Why 4) What you will read/study and 5) How (read, write, SOAP, mark, memorize, meditate)

* The iPod, iPad, iPhone may pacify, but only the I AM can satisfy

* Are you pacified or satisfied? Pacify = soothe agitation. Satisfy  = meet all requirements, fulfill all needs. What would happen if all we gave our babies was a paci and never fed them? Same with our spirit and soul.

* If you're not great, it's not because God didn't give you the opportunity; it's because the world gave you the opportunity to compromise and you took it.

* Do you want to build a condo or an estate? It takes years to build a legacy.

* God's goal is our heart, so our goal should be our children's hearts.

* Our goal is not morality, for them to mimic spirituality, to fill a bucket, but to LIGHT A FIRE!

* No one can live your life with integrity but YOU.

* Where are your kids going to learn unconditional love if not from you?

* I am a steward of my kids brains! "Love the Lord with all your mind."

* What do we want our kids to say about who we were as a Christian mom? We have to live that way NOW.

* God delights in using normal people to change the world, if they will just engage their hearts to be faithful!

* The wise woman builds her house (Prov 14:1)-- she has a plan! If you don't have one, someone else will give you one.

* She raises them in the Lord (Eph 6:4)-- You can't win the heart of your child if you're a Pharisee! They don't need to be indoctrinated. Don't live by rules, live by love!

* Lead them to show others God's love, to reap God's harvest. You can't live a radical life from inside a box.

* If we just don't know what do, we will follow the wrong people.

* Are you an adversary (in your face parenting) or an advocate (in your heart parenting)? Adversary is enemy based; advocate says, "I'm for you, I'm with you, and I believe in you."

* What is a heartshaping mother? She shapes with relationship that opens her child's heart with grace. She shapes with influence that fills her child's heart with truth. She shapes with culture that holds her child's heart with love.

* Our biblical model Jesus-- Our job isn't just teaching them all the facts they need to know, but to LOVE.

* A heartshaping mother's heart is shaped by God's Word-- every heart has two beats: intake and outflow. Deut 6:6-7 You cannot teach diligently to your child's heart what is not already in your own heart.

* The goal of a heartshaping mother is 1 Tim 1:5  "The goal of our instruction is love from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith."

* Winning the battle is never easy, but it IS possible!


What makes this mommy-me-time-away different from other conferences or retreats is that instead of feeling like you don't want it to end, you spend the last session tapping your foot eager to get home and love on your kids with your fresh revelation, while simultaneously soaking up every last bit! I highly recommend you check out Whole Heart Ministry and plan to attend next year... Sally Clarkson is full of so much wisdom and grace, and I was very blessed to listen to her speak about the gift of motherhood. =)