Oh Sleep, Oh Sleep, Where art thou?

Well, it's not as bad as it seemed with Julia, but REALLY... when am I supposed to get some rest already?

It was so nice to have my mom here, Riley off work, my niece here for a few days... and then something called reality happened. I'm all alone with the kids now, at least for 10 hours a day.

Not that I don't LOVE being a stay-at-home-mom, because I really do. I've looked forward to this "career" all my life.

But it's days like these that I just want to pull my hair out, crawl up in a hole and wake up to a clean house and happy children.

Here's what I mean: Julia hasn't been napping well since Josiah was born. I didn't realize at first that the two events coincided, but now it makes sense. This is a big change for everybody, including Big Sister. I'm not sure what it is about the new baby that makes her not want to take a nap, but she just outright will not go to sleep during the day. Which means I don't get a break, and Julia doesn't get the rest she needs. Many times she has fallen asleep in her high chair during a late afternoon snack. Which totally throws things off for a couple days. AGH!

I absolutely don't mind waking up to feed Josiah every couple hours at night, but it seems like most of the time, he eats (er, drinks) a full meal, is fast asleep, but then not five minutes after laying him down (in the pack-n-play next to our bed) he is fussing again for the boob. Which of course leads to bringing him into bed with me and nursing him there throughout most of the rest of the night. No biggie, I know how to co-sleep safely, and we all get our needs met, but I really do want him to sleep in his own bed. Hopefully it will happen in its own time. I know that he's still a newborn who's got his days and nights mixed up, so I'm not so discouraged about his patterns as I am my two-year-old darling.

She is so precious and funny and cute and sweet and smart. And defiant, and strong-willed, and fearless, and independent, and curious. So besides the challenges I had to deal with prior to birthing another child, now I have to go without sleep. Not because I have a newborn who eats ALL THE TIME. Because I can't "sleep when the baby sleeps." Seriously, I didn't know how important that was until those days were gone from possibility.

Oh, the joys of parenting.